If you try and bite me one more time, don't think I won't hand you over to those nutty Koreans who will scarf down anything that's put in front of 'em.
Well, I know..It's Wednesday, so I'm a few days late. Really, there is no excuse except according to Wikipedia I am currently entering the "Negotiation Phase" of culture shock. Straight from one of the best sources in existence: "In addition, they would feel sick and laziness" -Wikipedia. My English is worsening since I've been here, but isn't it supposed to just be "lazy." That's ok, Wikipedia rules regardless. Anyhow, yeah, I've been slacking on the blog.
Truth is, I don't think I can top last week's blog. And people are becoming accustomed to the white girl who strolls by them everyday 3x a day. Nonetheless, I still had a few humorous/interesting situations last week. My students still crack me up, I don't think listening to their English and the way they say things will ever get old.
In my morning class, I teach an age range of about 48-60. I'm just guessing..they are probably older, I am notorious here for guessing someone's age incorrectly..for example, a couple of weeks ago, I met a girl and I said "are you in elementary school?" Her response: "I'm 19." GRANTED...that is 18 in America, but still...big mistake. Anyhow, I digress....So, we were talking about things we have never done and what we would like to do. They usually talk to each other and I listen and pipe in to correct their English. So, Mrs. Nam asked Mrs. Ko if she had ever ridden on a motorcycle. Now, Mrs. Ko is one of my best students. She is very good at English and she thinks hard about how to respond and usually does so with almost perfect grammar and pronunciation. So, Mrs. Ko responds. "No." Mrs. Nam: "Would you like to?" Mrs. Ko, "yes....someday I would like to ride on a motorcycle along the water with a man.....a strong man....with long hair....and no shirt...and I would like to be hugging him." My response: "Mrs. Ko, are you describing your husband?" Then we all laughed for a bit while I pictured Mrs. Ko clinging to Fabio while driving on a motorcycle down the coast of California.
I don't think I mentioned this, but I picked up a second class the week before last. It's this group of nine 12 year olds who are sooooo sweet. They are actually pretty hilarious. They picked English names and one of the boys wants to be called Harry Potter. Sometimes when I call on him, he'll say lines from the movie before he answers. Anyways, they are great. So, one day I walk into the classroom and I see them all scurry to their seats. I was like, "hey guys, how are y...." then I saw it..all over the board was the word, F*&K..but without the strategically placed symbols. I looked back at their sweet angelic faces and they say, "We are good teacha, how are you?" Nothing phased them. Although I chuckled on the inside at their sweet faces with that nasty word all over the place, I sternly said, "this (pointing to the board) is very bad. Do not write it again." They agreed, and no problems yet. I mean don't you remember being 12 and learning a swear word in another language? I totally do.
Speaking of my younger students. Sometimes in class, when they are being wild, I say, "man you guys are crazy today." And I've noticed they all gasp a little and then laugh kind of nervously. So I asked someone this weekend if they noticed that in their classroom and the teacher who had been here for 2 1/2 years told me that when you say the word "crazy" the translation of that word means that the person is actually mentally crazy and dangerous and it's pretty offensive. SO, although a few students definitely are qualified to have the title "crazy," I've been trying to keep it out of my vocab, which is proving to be more of a challenge than I thought.
So yet another week of teaching ended. On Satuday I was able to attend a Korean wedding. One of my coworkers asked me if I wanted to go with her, so I decided it sounded like a great opportunity. And that it was. It was really interesting to see. First of all Koreans think anyone who marries under the age of 26 is out of their mind...boy would they be in for a culture shock if they came to little Dixon, Illinois. So, the bride was 31 and the groom was 36...BUT again, when I saw them I thought neither of them looked over the age of 21. Seriously, they age soooo well.
It was held at a hotel. At the wedding ceremony people sat at tables and there wasn't any bridesmaids or groomsmen..or even priest for that matter. Well, I don't think he was a priest..I think he was more of an MC..he stood over to the side. Anyway, the mothers came down the aisle first wearing their traditional Korean style dress. I think the dress is sooooo cute. Then the groom came down the aisle, walking almost at literal lighting speed. Then the bride was walked down the aisle by her father to some Celine Dion song.
The overall feel of the wedding was not very serious. People were talking, kids were running around, young people were flirting it up in the corners of the room...it was like a ceremony and reception all mashed up into one fairly quick event. But a few parts did make me a little teary eyed...like when her father gave a speech and the bride cried. But apparently weddings in Korea are famous for their complete randomness. Someone I was talking to said that the last wedding they went to a Korean man dressed up as Santa Clause came skipping down the aisle in the middle of the ceremony throwing candy to everyone...this wedding wasn't quite that random, but I thought there were some definite highlights: -the groom sang to the bride but forgot the words midsong. -at random times, this bubble machine would spew bubbles everywhere. AND -the groom's friends gave them a special present in the middle of the ceremony..a choreographed hip hop boy/girl dance...3 girls and 3 guys performed this HIGHLY inappropriate dance RIGHT in front of the grandparents table where there was alot of bootyshakin and poppin'. I actually recorded some of it, but blogspot never lets me upload videos. The face of the parents and grandparents was priceless.
After the ceremony we went upstairs to eat some food. It was this HUGE buffet, full of Korean, Japanese, and Chinese food. Lots of raw fish, kimchi, meat and rice. I stuck with what I knew wouldn't give me parasites, and I actually ate some onion rings..well what I thought were onion rings. By the third onion ring, I figured out it was squid, not onions that I was eating. Go figure. That's ok, I'm not against squid. So, the day was really fun and I cherished being the only foreigner at the wedding. The bride and groom even thanked me for coming..in English :)
Here are a few pics of the big day:
Truth: the Korean wedding crowd is not all that different from the American wedding crowd... their thoughts: "The wedding ceremony is nice. Man, they are taking FOREVER to take their pictures. Finally, now let's get our EAT on!"
Hope everyone is doing very very well and keeping warm...winter is a comin'!
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