"Oh"

Dear Mr. Oh,
You're the best Sunday morning date out there...except when you "forget" your wallet.

Eh, well, so much for Thanksgiving resolutions. I had every intention of writing this blog 2 days ago, but as usual, I have no real excuse.

So, I'm sure you are all on the edge of your seats waiting to hear how my Thanksgiving went. Right? Right. But first I have to tell you about a man named Oh...Mr. Oh.


I met Mr. Oh for the first time when we took my dad to the bus station a week after I arrived. Mr. Oh is the driver of the church I go to, so he offered to give us a ride to the station. After we sent my dad off, he drove me around Gunsan for awhile, telling me of his past "love"...Miss Penny. The story is too long to tell, but basically Ms. Penny was a woman who Mr. Oh loved once upon a time. She was an American working for a short time in Gunsan, and he was a Korean man looking for love. And love he found with this beautiful blond American. However, he did not speak English at the time and nor did she speak Korean, but according to Mr. Oh they were supposed to be married. Well, long story short, Mr. Oh was under the impression they would somehow connect in the next year and get married, BUT Miss Penny left no phone number, address, or....last name. She boarded a plane, America bound, and never was heard from again...well, at least by Mr. Oh. I have a good feeling there was a major language and cultural barrier..poor girl, she probably didn't even know what was happening...or maybe she did.

Mr. Oh finally gave up on Miss Penny and gave into his mother's wish to have an arranged marriage with a Korean woman. He has been happily married for many many years..I think he is somewhere in his 80's, but then again, you know how I am with age these days.

SO, that's Mr. Oh. He picks me up every Sunday morning for church. But before church we always go for breakfast. He is one hilarious man. He learned English from Sesame Street. He loves the airforce. He LOVES America. He loves his "girlfriend" ( his wife). He loves classical music..especially in Italian. He loves speaking English. He loves God. And he LOVES Dunkin Donuts. So, every Sunday morning since I've arrived, we have a Sunday morning "date" at Dunkin Donuts. We order the same thing and he chatters away in a broken English while I sleepily nod but only understanding about 40% of what he is said. Nonetheless, I've grown to really love and look forward to our Sunday morning dates.

Thanksgiving morning was a little bit of a sad morning. No Macy's Day Parade. No waking up and helping/snacking on Thanksgiving dinner. No movie with the Gabriel girls to look forward to. BUT my church was having a Thanksgiving lunch. I still had to work, but I have a lunch break everyday from 11 a.m.-3:00 pm.

On Thanksgiving, Mr. Oh came to pick me up after my class let out. The Thanksgiving service was to begin at 11 a.m. I finished class a little early and got to the van at about 10:55. (Note: Mr. Oh is ALWAYS early..very early...like 2o-30 min early) So, as soon as I got into the van, Mr. Oh took off. I've never seen anyone drive like he drove...and there were children in the back, but the crazy driving didn't seem to phase them, they are Korean after all. I counted. We barely missed squashing 5 people. We straight up ran 7 red lights. Average speed was probably 70 mph (maybe an exaggeration, it seemed REALLY fast sitting in the front seat.) And we turned a 15 minute drive into a 7 minute one. All the while, Mr. Oh would shout randomly, "Watch yo back!"

We arrived fashionably late and obviously, I survived.

One of my favorite parts of Thanksgiving was hearing what one man was thankful for. Pastor Li is a Korean man that comes to the church every week. On Thanksgiving he said how thankful he was for freedom..especially freedom to worship. He told us a story from his childhood. He lived through the times when North Korea ruled South Korea. He said it was a very difficult for South Koreans. North Korea would not allow anyone to go to church for 2 years. But one infamous day, a white man gave Pastor Li (boy) a piece of chocolate. This man was General MacArthur--The American general who drove out North Korea and fought for and achieved the freedom of South Korea. Here's a man who knows what it's like to live without freedom, and therefore can truly appreciate it. I think a majority of my generation could learn a lesson or two from Pastor Li on what it means to be thankful for freedom. He also is a Vietnam Vet.

So, I got back to class and immediately regretted all that turkey. I fought Turkey Coma all day, but I somehow managed.

Saturday was a long day. I woke up at 5 a.m. and a group of ladies from the church went to Seoul to do some holiday shopping. We went to a huge market and I got lots of "asian" looking gifts for Christmas. I still have so much more to do though :( But anyways, here are my thoughts on Seoul:

*It looks just like NYC or any other big city in the United States
*No one stares or is impressed that you have white skin and can speak English very well
*Everyone speaks English..you look like a fool if you try to use the little bit of Korean you know
* It's no Gunsan where the ajuma's (grandmas) roam free and rule the streets
*their markets can't hold a candle to my Myeung San Shi Jang Market

Lastly, you've probably seen more news on this North Korea situation. From the looks of things, it seems like tensions are still high but it feels like South Korea is moving forward. However, if North Korea does something else along these lines, I don't think South Korea is just going to lay down and take it.

On Sunday night, I had a wonderful night. I had popcorn and hot chocolate for dinner and watched a movie. It was really relaxing. Before I went to bed, I remembered to put some documents in my "emergency evacuation" bag and watched CNN just to check up on the situation. Of course the last words I heard were, "and tensions are still very high." At 2 a.m. I woke up to the biggest explosion I had ever heard. I mean my apartment shook and my windows rattled, I woke up in a panic. Immediately I turned my TV on...fuzzy. I tried my internet..no connection. I thought, "this is really happening. Well, I think I'm safe in my market. Should I call the pastor? Should I call my coworkers? Should I somehow make a dash for the Airforce base? Why did I only put capris, a tshirt, and a toothbrust in my evacuation bag? What good is a toothbrush without toothpaste? What about Lily?" (actually I didn't even give Lily a second a thought..what..she bites me;) ) And then I heard something that sounded more like thunder and saw what looked more like lightening. And after a few minutes, I came to the conclusion that it was a thunderstorm and not a North Korean attack. (HUGE sigh of relief...especially from Lily)

Well, that wraps another blog. It's been a good week this week, especially since a little baby boy named Abram Isaiah Garcia came into the world a few days ago! If you have time and you're around, you should make something meaty and cheesy and bring it over to the Garcia house :) Have a great week and weekend everyone!

Korea is where it's at

Dear North Korea,
This is not ok.

Hello all! It's actually Thanksgiving (which is not celebrated in Korea) right now and in 2 minutes it will officially be Thanksgiving Day in America :) However, I will talk about today and my Thanksgiving in my next blog because I realize I have fallen behind, and I need to have material for when I write my next blog on Mondayish. My Thanksgiving resolution is to be more consistent with the blog :)

So, anyways, this past week and a half was not really that eventful, until Monday afternoon. And if you haven't been hiding under a rock, than you would know about the current situation with North Korea...if you HAVE been hiding under rock which is probably most of my college friends and others my age here is a link to the story.

There is MUCH speculation as to why North Korea did what they did, but reality: no one knows why North Korea does what they do. I think right now is most important for the South Korean president and our President to sit down with China's leaders and figure this thing out before it's too late.

Nonetheless, mother, I am perfectly safe. And although the news is really giving this a lot of attention, the U.S. Airforce base in my city seems to be going about business as usual. So, it doesn't seem it's so extreme that I will have to evacuate or anything. However, I did pack a little "necessity" bag if something does go down.

My adult students reactions were the worst. One lady started to cry. She said one of the Korean marines was from our city of Gunsan and that he was only a few days from getting out of the service. So, the mood is definitely a somber one.

O.k. enough about this...on a lighter note, this past week was a pretty good one. My students are good, my adult students remain my favorite with my high school students coming in at close second. I've noticed the more comfortable my adult students get with me, the more they go on and on about things. They tend to talk in circles, and this week I asked one of them a question and then all of a sudden my brain totally left the situation. As she was talking these were my thoughts: "man, it was a cold walk today. I can't believe that dog followed me for two blocks. I miss Cami. Remember how different she looked when she got a haircut? I need a haircut. I wonder if Koreans know how to cut Americans hair. More importantly, I wonder if they know how to cut curly hair. Maybe I'll see if Erika can trim it when she comes. Oh man, I can't wait for Erika to come. What should we do? I need to look into things to do in Seoul. right? right? right? right?" Then I quickly realized my student was asking me if she was right? So it's taking a great deal of focus these days to keep with them. But they really are improving, and it's great to see them talking SO much English.

On Fridays we have game day here at my Hagwon and we play games like Up Words and another English game called Word Up. Up Words is like Scrabble. One of my elementary school students spelled the word UAE this week. Of course I said, "that's not a word, you weakling." (I didn't really say "weakling") And then he was like, "um yeah, it's a country." And I was like, " No it's not." But then I vaguely remembered that in my last semester of college I remember learning about United Arab Emirates in my geography class. And although it was an abbreviation and I shouldn't have given it to him, I did anyway to applaud his thinking. Seriously, the kids 12, I learned about that country when I was 22. Korean education, ridiculous.

Also same day, one of the games had multiple choice questions. The question was, "Which is not delicious?" a) a banana cake b.) a chocolate cookie c.) a spider sandwich The student thought about for a minute and said the answer was probably "a" but that it really depends on the person...a Korean would say that.

Speaking of gross food. Last Friday my morning class of adult students took me to this bird lookout and then out to lunch. At this lookout, they had these silkworms cooking in a pot and a lady selling them. In my old "western" way of thinking, I would have thought those worms were snacks for the birds, but in my brand new "Asian" thinking, I knew those worms were snack for us humans. So, my students bought some and told me I needed to eat one because I needed an adventure while I am in Korea. So, I did as Koreans do and chewed that worm right up. It tasted like......a worm. And it may have upset my stomach a tad, but it had to be done and a memory was made. Here's a pic of the worm:
And the last story of the week that was pretty funny, yet embarrassing happened early last week. In my building there are 5 floors. Our school is on the 4th floor. I take the elevator every morning with pretty much the same people. Twice the doors have shut on me when I've attempted to catch it at the last minute. But last Tuesday, I was on the other side.

There were about 5 of us in this small elevator and I was closest to the buttons because I get off first. So as the doors were closing this older lady made a surprisingly quick dash towards the elevator. Like clockwork, the doors shut on her too...they literally shut on her. So, with my catlike reflexes I push the button to open the doors and let her on, but while I was holding the button down, the doors still remained shut, her tiny Korean shoulders squished in between these two elevators. The elevator got really quiet and all eyes were on me..especially the eyes of the woman stuck in the door. And after the longest 5 seconds of my life, I realized I was pushing the button that closes the doors. So embarrassing, yet the look on her face and the fact that she didn't say anything, not even a sound, while she was stuck was pretty hilarious.

Well, I never think I'm going to write as much as I do. So, if you didn't get to the bottom of this post in one sitting, don't feel bad. I probably wouldn't either. Happy Thanksgiving everyone..eat tons and tons of turkey for me! Oh yeah, and special shout out to my "secret" followers, you know who you are....Phil.

Mawiage is what bwings us togetha today

Dear Lily,
If you try and bite me one more time, don't think I won't hand you over to those nutty Koreans who will scarf down anything that's put in front of 'em.

Well, I know..It's Wednesday, so I'm a few days late. Really, there is no excuse except according to Wikipedia I am currently entering the "Negotiation Phase" of culture shock. Straight from one of the best sources in existence: "In addition, they would feel sick and laziness" -Wikipedia. My English is worsening since I've been here, but isn't it supposed to just be "lazy." That's ok, Wikipedia rules regardless. Anyhow, yeah, I've been slacking on the blog.

Truth is, I don't think I can top last week's blog. And people are becoming accustomed to the white girl who strolls by them everyday 3x a day. Nonetheless, I still had a few humorous/interesting situations last week. My students still crack me up, I don't think listening to their English and the way they say things will ever get old.

In my morning class, I teach an age range of about 48-60. I'm just guessing..they are probably older, I am notorious here for guessing someone's age incorrectly..for example, a couple of weeks ago, I met a girl and I said "are you in elementary school?" Her response: "I'm 19." GRANTED...that is 18 in America, but still...big mistake. Anyhow, I digress....So, we were talking about things we have never done and what we would like to do. They usually talk to each other and I listen and pipe in to correct their English. So, Mrs. Nam asked Mrs. Ko if she had ever ridden on a motorcycle. Now, Mrs. Ko is one of my best students. She is very good at English and she thinks hard about how to respond and usually does so with almost perfect grammar and pronunciation. So, Mrs. Ko responds. "No." Mrs. Nam: "Would you like to?" Mrs. Ko, "yes....someday I would like to ride on a motorcycle along the water with a man.....a strong man....with long hair....and no shirt...and I would like to be hugging him." My response: "Mrs. Ko, are you describing your husband?" Then we all laughed for a bit while I pictured Mrs. Ko clinging to Fabio while driving on a motorcycle down the coast of California.

I don't think I mentioned this, but I picked up a second class the week before last. It's this group of nine 12 year olds who are sooooo sweet. They are actually pretty hilarious. They picked English names and one of the boys wants to be called Harry Potter. Sometimes when I call on him, he'll say lines from the movie before he answers. Anyways, they are great. So, one day I walk into the classroom and I see them all scurry to their seats. I was like, "hey guys, how are y...." then I saw it..all over the board was the word, F*&K..but without the strategically placed symbols. I looked back at their sweet angelic faces and they say, "We are good teacha, how are you?" Nothing phased them. Although I chuckled on the inside at their sweet faces with that nasty word all over the place, I sternly said, "this (pointing to the board) is very bad. Do not write it again." They agreed, and no problems yet. I mean don't you remember being 12 and learning a swear word in another language? I totally do.

Speaking of my younger students. Sometimes in class, when they are being wild, I say, "man you guys are crazy today." And I've noticed they all gasp a little and then laugh kind of nervously. So I asked someone this weekend if they noticed that in their classroom and the teacher who had been here for 2 1/2 years told me that when you say the word "crazy" the translation of that word means that the person is actually mentally crazy and dangerous and it's pretty offensive. SO, although a few students definitely are qualified to have the title "crazy," I've been trying to keep it out of my vocab, which is proving to be more of a challenge than I thought.

So yet another week of teaching ended. On Satuday I was able to attend a Korean wedding. One of my coworkers asked me if I wanted to go with her, so I decided it sounded like a great opportunity. And that it was. It was really interesting to see. First of all Koreans think anyone who marries under the age of 26 is out of their mind...boy would they be in for a culture shock if they came to little Dixon, Illinois. So, the bride was 31 and the groom was 36...BUT again, when I saw them I thought neither of them looked over the age of 21. Seriously, they age soooo well.

It was held at a hotel. At the wedding ceremony people sat at tables and there wasn't any bridesmaids or groomsmen..or even priest for that matter. Well, I don't think he was a priest..I think he was more of an MC..he stood over to the side. Anyway, the mothers came down the aisle first wearing their traditional Korean style dress. I think the dress is sooooo cute. Then the groom came down the aisle, walking almost at literal lighting speed. Then the bride was walked down the aisle by her father to some Celine Dion song.

The overall feel of the wedding was not very serious. People were talking, kids were running around, young people were flirting it up in the corners of the room...it was like a ceremony and reception all mashed up into one fairly quick event. But a few parts did make me a little teary eyed...like when her father gave a speech and the bride cried. But apparently weddings in Korea are famous for their complete randomness. Someone I was talking to said that the last wedding they went to a Korean man dressed up as Santa Clause came skipping down the aisle in the middle of the ceremony throwing candy to everyone...this wedding wasn't quite that random, but I thought there were some definite highlights: -the groom sang to the bride but forgot the words midsong. -at random times, this bubble machine would spew bubbles everywhere. AND -the groom's friends gave them a special present in the middle of the ceremony..a choreographed hip hop boy/girl dance...3 girls and 3 guys performed this HIGHLY inappropriate dance RIGHT in front of the grandparents table where there was alot of bootyshakin and poppin'. I actually recorded some of it, but blogspot never lets me upload videos. The face of the parents and grandparents was priceless.

After the ceremony we went upstairs to eat some food. It was this HUGE buffet, full of Korean, Japanese, and Chinese food. Lots of raw fish, kimchi, meat and rice. I stuck with what I knew wouldn't give me parasites, and I actually ate some onion rings..well what I thought were onion rings. By the third onion ring, I figured out it was squid, not onions that I was eating. Go figure. That's ok, I'm not against squid. So, the day was really fun and I cherished being the only foreigner at the wedding. The bride and groom even thanked me for coming..in English :)

Here are a few pics of the big day:
Truth: the Korean wedding crowd is not all that different from the American wedding crowd... their thoughts: "The wedding ceremony is nice. Man, they are taking FOREVER to take their pictures. Finally, now let's get our EAT on!"

Hope everyone is doing very very well and keeping warm...winter is a comin'!

Bikes, Masks, Dogs, and Champions

Dear extremely naughty 7 year old Korean boy,
You are testing my very last nerve; I'm about to bust a cap...it's a good thing you are so darn cute.

Well hello there my faithful readers, you are about to dive into a reading on my wacky weekly adventures. I think if I didn't blog, these crazy situations would become the norm...I hope that never happens..If they do become what's "normal," life back in the states will probably seem like such a drag. Anyways, let me do my best at explaining this week in a few short stories...

Right off the bat, on my Monday morning walk to work, I had a situation. I was walking, headphones in, music blasting, gettin' my walk on when I see out of the corner of my eye a bicyclist coming up behind me. This is normal, usually they just ring their little bell, I step to the side and the 85 year old pulls a wheelie and zips right past me..well after a few short seconds, I notice he is riding at the same pace as my walking..and I feel his stares...So, while I continue walking and he continues riding right next to me, I pull out my left ear bud and say, "Yes?" He says, "How old you?" I thought about not answering him for a second, but then decided this 60 year old man was harmless AND this would make for a good blog story..so i say, "I'm 22." He says, "No, you 18. (then starts spouting Korean for about 30 seconds)." And I say, "Uh, no, I'm 22. Do I look 18?" and he says, "No, you 18. (spouts more Korean)." Then he just rode off into the distance, probably to interrogate the next foreigner about her age.

The SAME night..I was riding home on my bus, again listening to my music..enjoying the 5 minute bus ride that is a 35 minute walk. However, I must have been "hacking" up a storm because this adorable little old lady, walks over to me and says, here, and motions to her mouth. I noticed it was a mask..like a surgical mask..like the masks everyone wore when Swine Flu reared it's ugly head last year...immediately I said, "Im so sorry." She just smiled and sat back in her seat..thankfully my stop was the next stop so I didn't have to break out the mask then and there...and just so you know..the mask was in a sealed package and is actually kinda comfortable. Here's a pic :)


I have a funny notion that she had been riding the bus with me all week and she bought this mask with me in mind..what a sweet way to say, "honey child, you best cover up that mouth and not spread them foreign germs round."

So, classes are going pretty well..but there is this ONE class who I just cant seem to get a handle on..it's actually this ONE student..his name is Subin..he is as cute as can be, but he is as naughty as they come..whoever says Korean children are way more well behaved than American children need to spend 10 minutes with Subin and they will think differently. So, I gave a test this week and I warned them and tried to prepare them all..and everyone did so well..actually they all got A's..well, except Subin..who particularly enjoys taking apart his chair and whistling through the lessons everyday. He did not do so hot..so when he saw all his friends got A's and he didn't even pass, he thought the solution to this problem was to shred his test to tiny pieces and throw them in the air making one loud grunt sound. I was fuming. I was a bit speechless. I was like, "why didn't I take education classes." As firmly as possible I grabbed the piece of chair he was currently taking apart and said, NO!" He didn't really respond..but the little girl across the room says, "Teacha, you strong." I said, "Thanks Sara." and she says, "Teacha, you are Champion." And it kinda made my day..my thoughts were, "Yeah, I am champion, all these kids just passed with A's and even spelled the word veterinarian correctly for pete sake!" Subin and I settled things after class and he picked up every single piece and put it in the trash. He is definitely still a struggle, and I'm sure I'll have more stories from him in the near future.

O.k. last story. This one I couldn't hold in..I just busted up laughing in front of my small adult class. So, this class is an hour long. It's pretty much just a conversation class. My students are from 22 to 31 years old. They are a great class. So, this week we were asking questions like, "Have you ever" So this is exactly how the conversation went:
girl to guy: "Have you ever had a pet?"
guy: "Yes, I had a pet dog"
girl: "When was the last time you had a pet dog."
guy: "The last time I had a pet dog was 13 years ago."
girl: "Why don't you have it now?"
guy: "We ate it."

My jaw immediately dropped, "NO WAY!" And he says, "Yes, of course." And after the initial shock wore off, we all started laughing. But it was true...so true. Different cultures.

So, thus ended my week of happenings. My weekend was pretty wonderful. Saturday, Elizabeth and I spent the whole day on the US airforce base here in Gunsan. We met a couple friends from church to play racquetball and basketball. We went and ate at a restaurant on base where I ate a burger and fries...so so so wonderful, so American..I really hadn't had beef in a month and a half. It was just great being surrounded by other Americans. Understanding their language, their culture, hearing the words "Excuse me," was all just music to my ears. Also, our friend Jon was able to show us inside one of the hangers (maybe it's not called a hanger?) and we got to see an F16..it was pretty awesome..seeing a plane that if war were to break out would be way up their fighting for me. And we topped off the day with watching the movie "Stardust." The company was great, the food was amazing, and the feel of being somewhere familiar was just fantastic.

Well..I hope you are healthy and full of joy today :) God Bless America!